I have often felt and made it a point to declare that, I feel lonely even when I am amidst people... people whom I know, people I trust, people I love. I am perfectly present with them... talking, sharing, laughing and enjoying the camaraderie.
Yet I suddenly feel aloof. I feel that I drift away... partially conscious of the event. I feel alone and lonely.
Whenever I have voiced this feeling out, it seems to boomerang. Many of the people I know, have told me that they have felt the same way too. I have always been curious about this feeling while surreptitiously enjoying it. Over a period of time I learned to admit that I do enjoy it. You can never keep secrets from your own self.
Today, as I was reading an article in The Speaking Tree, it came as a revelation to me that this feeling of loneliness we experience while we are with others... in a way is perfect! Now I know why I secretly enjoyed it.
There are certain laws or codes, most of them unwritten which we learn as we play the game of life. We have to hit the turf to know how these laws function. The one which I am writing about today can be related to one of the fundamental laws of 'attachment with detachment' which Lord Krishna preaches through The Gita.
We are not meant to get completely lost. Neither should we be completely lost in our own inner worlds nor should we completely dilute ourselves in the crowd. If we are on earth, most of our karma unfolds through our interactions with people whether physical, mental, emotional or spiritual. Hence, as I understand it, there is a point of intersection between 'being with others' and 'being by oneself'.
This point is yet another Paradox of Existence. I am continuing to explore it...continuing to explore the Perfection in the Paradox.
